Master Nick's Master Bathroom

I finally finished work on my master bathroom today! I'm embarrassed to say that the project has taken me over 3 years to complete. The bright side is, it's EXACTLY what I wanted and I did most of the work myself.

The bathroom originally had an old blue bathtub that was sunken into the floor and enclosed by a brick wall with an arched entrance way and a dropped down ceiling. It made it look like a weird cave. And it was dangerous as hell to step so far down into the bathtub. I almost killed myself at least a dozen times. (OK... there may have been margaritas to blame for that.) Outdated, powder blue tile covered the walls of the bath cave and the entire bathroom floor.

So I broke out the sledge hammer and smashed down the brick wall. Revved up the reciprocating saw and cut the bathtub in half so that it could be removed from the room. Ripped out all the tile and stripped it all down to the cinder block walls and concrete floor. FUN!

Then stuff started happening. My mom, who had been sick for a long time already, got sick to the point where she needed constant care. Then she died and I had to take care of her husband for a while until he moved back to New York. Next I had to use the money I had saved up for several unexpected emergencies. Then my shoulder started acting up and I couldn't physically do the work. I hired someone to build the shower pan and do the plumbing but I fired him because he kept shirking his responsibilities and messing up the things he did do. I also hired someone to do the tile and plaster work, but I ended up having to finish a lot of that when he disappeared. It's hard to find good help here in Florida. Ultimately, I had to wait until my surgery was almost healed up before I could finish the rest of the work, like the rest of the plumbing and installing the fixtures.

I can't complain about doing the work on my bathroom. I LOVE doing that kind of work. It helps that I have a HUGE fetish for power tools. Seriously! I get a big stiffie every time I walk through the tool section at Sears. And, for me, a trip to Home Depot is better than a trip to the bathhouse. (Not that I've ever been to one of those, of course.) I have just about every power tool you could want in my garage in addition to the most popular one that I keep in my pants. (Sorry, that just slipped out.)

If I could turn back time (like Cher) I would most definitely have taken my career in a different direction. Instead of being an artist I would be a construction worker. Heavy duty, hot and sweaty, back breaking construction. I'm never happier than when I have a power tool or a sledge hammer in my hands and I'm pounding away at some big, bulky structure. Actually, now that I think of it, I guess that's my Master Nick persona rearing it's nasty head. If I think about it, I guess some heavy duty fucking would run a close second to construction work. Either way, I end up sweaty, exhausted and satisfied in the end.