Wednesday, July 28, 2010


It's 3:15am here. East Coast time. I think. I just got out of bed after 3 hours of "sleep". I put that in quotes because i don't consider laying there in pain while the world spins around you sleep.

I got up because I was feeling severely dehydrated, wrapped one of the blankets around me "Virgin Mary" stype, and I stumbled to the kitchen for a drink of whatever I have in my refrigerator. I look over at the counter and the maze of tubes at the top of the hamster cage has collapsed. Their combined weight must have shifted the tubes and they separated. I found Bubba trapped in the sink (thank God I left the drain plug in!) but The Fat One is no where to be found. She must have jumped off the countered and scurried away. I looked everywhere that I could and no trace of her. She probably crawled up into one of the holes in the wall that the rats used to use and is now living in my walls or addict. She can always come back and find some bird seed on the floor to eat, unless she gets to some of the rat poisoning in the addict or unless a stray rat in my roof eats here. I don't think there are any rats, but I'm not sure.

So I just wanted to write a quick blog post updating you on my BIG ILSB (International Leather Sir boy contest), My live shoot for their new website "Bound in Public" (which will debut in October), Dore Alley, and the very hot photo shoot I did for Mr. S Leather with boy Sean.

The contest was exhausting. Supporting Sean through the very emotional and physically strenuous event was beyond exhausting and has taken a toll on our bodies and spirits. Sean has a big black eye, a swollen face, to add to the cracked ribs that he re injured. I sprained my wrist and Master Mark (the Sir that was running for the title with Sean) has a broken thumb. Needless to say the Fantasy scene was EXTREME. Very Extreme. I've attached some photos of the scene which included, punching, spitting, a stun gun, flogging, mock fisting, breath control, CBT (Ya... that's a bucket tied to Sean's nuts and I'm throwing everything from the stage, including my shoes, in it. Boy Sean collapsed the minute he stumbled off the stage and I had to hold him like a little broken baby while they scrambled to run up the stairs and retrieve the key for the hand cuffs.

Alas, Sean did not win the competition. A big part of me is glad that he didn't. He is an Alpha boy, and I feel that he has to lock away who he really is to be a good boy. Winning the contest would mean a year of traveling and being a role model international title holder boy everywhere he went. Fucking exhausting! He should be VERY proud of all the work he did the past year preparing and competing in the contest. Unfortunately, I doubt he feels like that yet. He probably feels like he just lost something that meant a lot to him and that he gave up a year of his life for. His friends are there for him, as they have been through this entire process.

I started feeling sick even before the trip to San Francisco started. But there wasn't room for that in the busy schedule. Sean's contest required pretty much constant attention from me. I was there to support him after all. I think I did a good job. I sucked up the way I was feeling and the morning after the 3 day contest was over I got ready for my Live "Bound in Public" shoot for at Dore Alley. There was a last minute change in my scene partner and I was SO FREAKING happy to find that my good friend Luke Riley was going to be the sub for the shoot. I LOVE that boy. Plain and simple. He has a bright soul that shines brightly, even when he is being a bad boy. And he's HOT as fuck. We were like 2 little kids all day at the street fair. It was the first time for both of us. I'm so glad I got to share the experience with him.

We shot all day, in different locations at the fair, with the interaction of the massive crowds who were watching us. I have to say I really got off on it. Luke really reacted to the Public Humiliation and it was an awesome show. After we finished filming at the fair, we found a not so busy street and did the sex scenes. People were walking and driving by and it was HOT. The energy from the "danger" of being caught was through the roof. I can't wait to see the edited version of the shoot.

I finished the shoot and my body was just about out of commission. But I still had a photo shoot to do with boy Sean for Mr. S Leather the next day. It was the first time that Sean had done a photo shoot... and the first time he would be tied up naked and played with in front of a camera crew. As I thought, he completely got off on it and the shoot was AWESOME! Bondage, butt toys... good times!

After that we ate some food and I was almost not even able to walk any more. Our flight was at 11:55pm and by the time I got on the plane I didn't even know where I was. We arrived the next morning, after only sleeping like an hour... I think, and I drove home to get check on my house, take care of the animals, get my dog, and RUN to the doctor's office.

I am actually feeling pretty horrible right now. Don't worry... it's nothing serious. I just need to start taking better care of myself. I guess you can't burn the candle at both ends for too long a time without your body getting pissed at you. I spent the whole freakin day at the doctor's office. I ended up getting home at 8:30pm and started to do the web design work I had promised to have ready for today. I have a meeting about it in a few hours and I was not able to get to it. I forced some food down my throat and layed on the couch trying to work on my laptop. Half hour after midnight I gave up and dragged my aching body to bed.

That takes us to the missing hamster and this post. There is nothing I can do about the hamster right now. I'm going to take some advil and pray that my head stops pounding and that I fall asleep again quickly. Tomorrow I have the web design meeting and I HAVE to have something ready to show them. I've already let them down before. I hope I recover quickly from being sick, because I fly back out to San Francisco in about a week for a couple of shoots and then I fly back home for a day before I fly to P-town for a 10 day vacation. I wish there was someone to baby me right now. To smack my hand, pick me off the couch and lead me to bed, and hold me while I fell asleep. Then again, the though of someone touching my right now, in the pain I'm in, sounds horrible. Pretty freakin dramatic... I know. Even a Dom is allowed his "Diva" moments.

Enjoy the photos from everything I talked about in this post and I will post better ones and more detailed stories as soon as I can.


Jambrea said...

I was just thinking of you last night, worried because you hadn't posted. I hope your medicine kicks in and you start to feel better. I'm glad you had a good time even though you were sick. Take it easy.

joyroett said...

Hope you feel better soon!

Sue said...

Hamsters can live in the wild just fine, especially in Florida. You'll probably never see it again. He'll probably get predated before he can eat the rat poison. Hamsters tend to go to ground rather than climb.

I do hope you can beat this illness before you need to travel again Nick! Take it easy.

Anonymous said...

Man, I am so sorry you're not feeling well. Try some Hot and Sour Soup, its not heavy and you can actually taste it thruogh the meds and illness. Always helps me feel better. I'd be glad to tuck you in, fluff your pillow and take care of you while you recover but its a long commute from La.

Glad you were able to have a such a good time on your trip. Sounds like a great experience. Looking forward to more. Take care.

Nick Moretti said...

I deleted your comment... something I very rarely do. WHAT THE FUCK? I have repeatedly written about bareback sex so you guys know that I practice safe sex.

THANK YOU for your well wishes and thoughts of concern. I just need to take a day or two off and take care of myself better. This last trip was so hectic. I didn't eat properly or rest much at all. A couple of days of eating right and working out and I will be right as rain. I really am looking forward to my next trip already.

Stan said...

Holy fuck! That Sean is hot as hell! He's a winner in my book!
Get well soon Nick!

Anonymous said...

Please take care of yourself...there is not much worse than feeling sick and dehydrated. I wish you you had someone, too. Someone to spoil you and nurse you back to health and find your hamster. :) BTW, just spent yesterday morning on FT. Lauderdale beach and I LOVED IT. I would seriously consider moving there if I could find work...its so beautiful. Take Care.

Michelle M.

alleen said...

Get better soon. Take a lot of rest and eat good. The pictures are very nice, and I am glad you had a good time.

Anonymous said...

Yeah Damien, that was a real jackass comment. Seriously, what the fuck! If that was your first reaction, you've got some deep seeded issues you might want to get some help with. People who live health and safe lives still get sick.

G-Baby said...

Hey baby, this entry has haunted me since reading it so i just have to respond. It's been a long hard journey for you with all these upheavals in your life over the past months, and change is not something you like. Getting sick like this is just another manifestation of the pain trying to leach the system. Hang in there, unfortunately time is the only healer, and that sucks. Lots of friends and great, working keeps you busy temporarily, and animals with their unquestioning love keep us believing there is a purpose in everything.

Just don't forget it ok to let people know your angry or upset. I'm sure you do have your moments, and then cover it up by making light of your situation and how you'll get over it lol. Sometimes you have to let others know you have definite boundaries, otherwise they just keep pushing you to a place where your just not comfortable. Your real friends will understand, the others don't matter.

There's something about you that just calls to me (shit, that makes me sound like a stalker!). I've followed your online career for a while now. You're AWESOME! Don't let anyone say otherwise. But life around us changes as we get older. Goals, priorities, wants and needs. Perhaps this is exactly what this is. The harder we hang onto things the bigger the shake up has to be!

You give all of us so much of yourself, and I feel really selfish in knowing that I have laughed, cried, got angry and just generally been entertained by your commitment, enthusiasm and honesty on your blog site and never written you one response just to tell you how special it is and how much I love being given a window into your life to share with you (and all your other fans).

Apologies for taking up so much room on your blog. Now I've taken the leap in writing back I'll hopefully leave shorter ones in future (hope springs eternal on that one). Take it easy sweet thing, love is only an hello away

Anonymous said...

Still pissed at dumbass Damien. "Hate to be rude but..." means that you are a rude fucking bastard who doesn't know shit from shinola or give a fuck about how others feel. Closed minded fuck probably hasn't had more than his own hand in so long he can't remember what a real man feels like.

Anonymous said...

Now GBaby has struck a nerve. You need hot and sour soup not a page out of some ill conceived selfhelp book. People do get sick for no other reason than they come across a germ that digs in and tries to make a home in your body. Having a great weekend whether it be a leather or iron man event can wear a body down. Don't listen to these posers. Do what you need to do to take care of you. Best to you.

Damien said...

I was going to stay silent - but I don't think I will.

I have already sent an email to Nick.

To those of you who think I'm a dumb-ass - I am here to remind you that HIV is still the Number 1 health issue facing gay and homosexually active men and it was not a silly question to ask because THE BEST OF US CAN SLIP UP!!

I was an HIV educator for many years and saw the best of people slip up JUST once - and they got infected and died within 5 years. One of these people was the first man that I ever loved.

If you have read any of my other comments on Nick's blog you would realise that I have nothing but respect for Nick and think he is an intelligent, smart, talented and hot man.

Sadly - to have the reaction from a GENUINE comment of concern given our risk of HIV in our community - well........ that goes to show how lax we have become about HIV.

BTW - my husband puts his hand and more on my cock on a regular basis just thanks.

And Nick - again publicly - my apologies for a bumbled attempt of concern. As a Clinical Depressive I don't always get across how it SHOULD sound - even if my intentions are good.

Clearly, you took great offense to it and I apologise.

Ill back away quietly now.

Best for the future.



Stephen said...

Sorry to hear you're feeling sick.
Reading how active you are, its important to remember to stay hydrated, and eat well.
Feel better soon.

Pick said...

I read Damien's original comment for how it was meant ... CONCERN and only that. No implications were intended I'm sure. I understand why it touched a nerve but hey ... let it go!

To all those "Anonymous" comments with nasty remarks and name calling ... free speech is a wonderful thing but have the guts to sign your name if you're leaving derogatory statements about someone! And for God sakes ... grow up!

I'm a nice guy but don't get me riled over something ... nothing I hate more than asshole's who complain and don't have the guts to sign their names!

Cheers fellas!
Brett Dill

Now - see how easy that was to sign your name!

Pick said...

Oh yeah, and Nick .. hope you're feeling tons better. That crazy schedule of yours would knock anyone down for a bit. Just your body telling you to rest for a few days.

Anonymous said...

Nick, sorry for the storm. I read an accusation of irresponsiblity not of concern. I don't believe in kicking a man while he's down, unless of coures he wants to be. I didn't mean to rile but to rally. I may have mis-read the original comment and shot from the hip. As to my anonimity, it is mine and I intend on keeping it. If it lessens the legitimacy of my comments, that's a price I'm willing to pay for now. Hope you feel better soon, and again, I apologize to you. Take care.

Nick Moretti said...

To the last Anonymous comment poster who talked about me whining myself to sleep. You obviously know NOTHING about me and I want to know nothing about you, you peace of shit.
Find another blog to leave stupid messages on.

Nick Moretti said...

THANK YOU EVERYONE for your comments of concern and well wishes. I'm sorry I was in such a bad frame of mind when I did this post but I was really not feeling well. I need to learn to not post on those days. It usually just leads to bad feelings for everyone.